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Should we talk about weight?

I would prefer not to ever breach the subject, but let's just get it out of the way. Yes, weight is an issue for me. I was put on my first diet by a Doctor at 6 months old. This is a story I have heard on honestly countless occasions. There has never been a time in my life when weight was not an issue, and I can't imagine that there will ever be a time when that is not the case.

I have been every pants size from an 8 to a 24, and I have taught Yoga the entire time. So yes, that means that for several years, I was the largest person in the room no matter which side of the mat I was on.

In December of 2016 I underwent surgery, the gastric sleeve to help fix my situation. This is not for everyone. You can have an opinion on it, I have heard from several people before and after who do not believe it was the correct choice to make. All I can say to that is, then don't make it for yourself. I have attempted with success and failure innumerable times to loose weight. When I had success, I later had failure. For me, this felt like the answer I needed. I have had some weight gain from the smallest I was after surgery, and I'm not happy about it, but I'm not judging myself harshly for it either.

We all have our stuff that gives us problems. When it comes to weight, everyone else gets to instantly see what that weakness is. The on going battles we have within ourselves are the hardest to deal with. The dialog we have going on in our own mind, that voice whispering, and sometimes screaming, that we can't succeed, that we are a fraud, that we are worthless, that is the one we need to stop listening to, or maybe stop and hear it. Hear how absurd it really is. After all, there are so many things we have all succeeded at that we didn't at first believe we were capable of. Things that we were certain would crush us, didn't, or, maybe they did but we got back up.